Seinfeld - The Butter Shave

Jerry walks into his apartment sniffing the air, followed closely by Newman.

Jerry: Someone's cooking.

Newman: Hello, Jerry.

Jerry: Hello, Newman.

Newman: You know, old friend, sometimes I ponder this silly gulf between us and I say, "Why?" Are we really so different. For what is--

Jerry (cutting in): I'm not the one doing the cooking, Newman.

Newman: Damn you Seinfeld. You useless pustule. Um, somebody's got something on the griddle. maybe it's Kramer.

Jerry: No, he's up on the roof getting some sun with the butter - pause - Oh no!

Newman: Butter?

The Full Script